Computer model confirms earth is flat

Using sophisticated computer modeling to reproduce the effects of gravity on flying squirrels in Central Park, the Nasal Institute of Substandard Technology concluded that the earth is indeed, flat, as it appears to the reasonable mind. NIST scientists claimed that anyone who spreads the malicious conspiracy theory that the earth is round is not to be taken seriously by government scientists using the latest computer simulation models. NASA photos taken from government satellites also reveal a flat earth again confirming the government's position, "Flat as a pancake!" FAA spokesman, P.T. Barnone said yesterday. Meanwhile critics aren't convinced and plan a another rally at Confusion Hill demonstrating to skeptics how water can run uphill and pigs fly.